It’s time for a new game of Express Bingo. The rules are simple: when one of the following appear on the front page of the Daily Express, cross it off until the card is complete:
That’s right, no Diana. They just don’t write about her as much as they used to – unlike these twelve other subjects which are kept in a pretty heavy rotation.
You may have to be quick though. We got off to a flying start on Day 1 with ‘Weather‘, ‘Fuel Bills‘ and ‘The EU‘ all on the front page:
Day 1: The EU, Gas Bills and The Weather (of course) got us off to a flying start.
Then on Day 2 there was a fairly standard ‘How To Live Longer‘ story leaving the card a third complete after just two days:
Day 2: A ‘How to Live Longer’ story helped us cross off another square. The Weather was also on the front page (of course) but we’d already crossed that one off.
On Day 3 we drew a blank. There was a Weather story on the front page (of course), but we’d already crossed that off. However, Day 4 brought better news with a cure for Diabetes and a Pensions story alongside the ubiquitous, but already crossed off, Weather story (of course).
Day 4: Diabetes and Pensions (and weather, of course).
Day 5 and Day 6, things started to slow down a little. First there was a How To Live Longer story and the Weather (of course) but we didn’t need either of those again. Then there was a Pensions story and the obligatory, but now unnecessary, Weather story (of course).
Day 7 brought a double, with a story about grapes curing Alzheimer’s and advancing hordes of Foreigners! There was also a Weather story (of course):
Day 7: Alzheimer’s, Foreigners! and Weather.
However, on Day 8 we drew a blank and we didn’t fair much better on Days 9 and 10. Both had classic ‘Express Bingo’ stories but we’d already crossed off both Pensions and How To Live Longer.
A Pensions story and a How To Live Longer. Useless for the purposes of the game, sadly.
It seems incredible to think the Express has gone 10 days without an Arthritis, Benefits or House Prices story. It’s surely only a matter of days. Apparently Kate Middleton‘s absence can be explained by the fact she is currently on holiday on the private island of Mustique.
After 10 days the card looks like this: